Jake And Friends
Jake And Friends
Episode 54 - Biblical Manhood: Self Control
Topics Discussed:
Iron Bowl 2023
Self Control
Jesus
What is happening, everybody? Welcome back to another episode of Jake and Friends. It's Jake and Parker, and we're just hanging out. Um, so before we get into anything else, Parker, first we need to address your mustache.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Yes.
Track 1:doing this for? No, it's, no, it's
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:must ask
Track 1:currently, November 28th. I must ask you a question. It's currently November 28th, and if you're watching this on YouTube, but you should, and you should subscribe and you can watch, I think you can probably watch this on Spotify. I don't know. I have no idea. Just tell me if you can or not.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Yeah, I don't, know. I know it's on YouTube, but for those who listen on podcasts, yes. I have a mustache and literally like I have a, so I teach freshmen and I have a freshman that I. Thinks he can grow facial hair, but it's all just blonde, you know, just little peach fuzz.
Track 1:Pete Fuzz.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:and he knows, he knows he's just messing around. But he was like, he was like, Hey. He was like, Hey coach, you wanna grow your beard out for dose shave November? And I was like, sure, why not? I don't really care. And.
Track 1:Do it.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:I can't really grow a beard. Like, it's just like, it's not full. It's like a, it's more like a chin strap going down. But my chin has like a lot of facial hair. Uh, and then my mustache can get very thick and very long. Well, I wouldn't say very thick. It just gets long. It's still a little patchy. But anyways, I had it all during Thanksgiving and I just got on my nerves and I started shaving and I was like, well, I can't get back to school with a clean beer.'cause then I. Like me and that student, like he would just be like, coach, why don't you do that? I thought we were gonna our facial hair out. So I walked out the bathroom, I said, Kayla, what you think? And she was like, I've seen better, but I'll take it. I was like, that's all I need to know. So here we are. I have a mustache and I'm, well, we'll keep it at least maybe the rest of this week.
Track 1:I always do this thing where I will shave and then like I'll shave my mustache last, and they're like, I just won't shave the mustache, and I'll just walk around like, we're getting ready for church. You know, like every man with a wife has tried this at some point where you just see how long it takes'em to notice
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Hmm.
Track 1:and typically. It's about, um, six seconds or so before, she's like, no, you're gonna shave that. I'm like, please, I did it last year. Last, I wanna say last November I did, I did a mustache and I, I did it for like a six weeks maybe, and I was gonna, I don't even think it was November. I just think I did it and I was like, I'm gonna do it. And I had a, nobody complimented me except for one coworker who. When this coworker complimented me on my mustache, that's when I realized maybe I should shave the mustache. You know what I mean? Like it was the wrong, it was the wrong person to compliment the
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Mm, that's tough. Yeah, I've had a few, like on Monday,'cause I shaved it, obviously I was off all last week'cause the school was out, but, so Monday was our first day back and I came back and I, I had a lot of students be like. Coach, you got a mustache. And I was like, uh, yeah, I got a mustache. They're like, cool. And that was pretty much it. Then I had others that was like, you know, they're like, oh my gosh, you need to shave that. And I was like, I like to remind'em a lot. Like guys, if I cared what a 14 or 15-year-old thought about me. I'll be a very insecure man and don't take that, you know, don't take that personally. It's just the truth. I'm a grown man. Doesn't matter what 14 or 15 year olds think about me. So I always try to take that opportunity to be like, Hey, if my wife thinks it looks good, then I'm fine. If anybody, if she doesn't think it looks good, then I'm shaving it off. So
Track 1:Oh yeah, definitely. Um,
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:she doesn't think
Track 1:I don't, from what I can tell, it's not terrible. Um, I'd say it's a six on the scale. I mean, like, I mean like,
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:I'd say it's like a five. I. would say a five Because
Track 1:a seven is a good mustache. A seven's like I can, everyone accepts that mustache at a seven.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:I feel like a 10 is like, a Ron Swanson. Like a Ron Swanson mustache. Like that's a 10.
Track 1:it's a good one, it's a good stash. Um,
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:So,
Track 1:that's not bad though. Um,
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Hmm. Thanks.
Track 1:so the. No pun intended. Elephant in the room is the, uh, iron Bowl this past weekend. Um, so for those of you who don't know, I am an Auburn fan and Parker actually went to Auburn. And Parker, Parker has not shared this yet, I don't think. But you were a an equipment manager? No, a uh, athletic trainer. Sorry.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Yes. A student Athletic trainer.
Track 1:Student, athletic trainer. There's a very big difference. I learned. So you told me, uh, from 2011 to 2013, was that it?
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Uh, yeah. Mm-Hmm. for three years.
Track 1:was it?
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:three season? Yeah.
Track 1:Um, how, how was that? Was that fun? You went through the best and the worst.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:I did, man. So like my freshman year or my first year. So I transferred there from juco. So my first year at Auburn was, uh, the 2010 football season and we won national championships. That was awesome. Camden was there. I didn't work during that time, but uh, that following spring, so 2011 I started working. Um,'cause I thought that's what I want to do. You know, for my career, so I was studying exercise science and I thought I wanted to do some type of athletic training, pt, something like that. And so I just reached out and got a job and started it. And I enjoyed it. It was fun. But I realized quickly, like if you wanna be an athletic trainer or like at, especially at that level,'cause if you're gonna make any type of money that's, uh, you know, can support your family, uh. You have to be at that level pretty high. Um, and that requires a ton of time. So, long story short, I worked a ton and got paid nothing, but I had a lot of benefits. Like, you know, I gotta travel with a team. Went all the way games, uh, worked all the home games pretty much. Didn't have a day off during the, during the week, except, uh, on home, home games I had Friday night off. So other than that, I worked every day. So it was fun. Um, got a SC championship ring out of it.'cause 2013 in my final season, I won the SC championship. Went from three and nine. Uh, to, uh, I guess that, yeah, that was 2012 and then 2013 went National Championship and loss of Florida State, but got to experience all that and I actually missed out, I didn't even know this. I actually missed out. Um, the 2013 team had a, uh, reunion this past weekend at the Iron Bowl, um, that I could have gone to
Track 1:Oh, nice.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:I missed it. Um, so I guess I'll catch it another 10 years if Lord willing. But, um, but yeah, I'm, you know, bummed out by what happened on, but I'm not surprised at what happened. Iron ball, lemme just say that I'm not surprised.
Track 1:Yeah. Yeah. Well, I'm gonna, I'm gonna screen share real quick in case people, here we go. We're not good at screen sharing, so gimme that entire screen. Boy, this is Parker's. They use cookies. This is Parker's face right here. Parker is famously in the photo of Chris Davis running it back 109 yards.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:the kick six.
Track 1:in. you think Parker's a liar? This is Parker's mustache list face right there. He was really
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Yep.
Track 1:but
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:what's really cool about that whole week, that was like one of the best weeks of my life because, uh, my family always gets together for Thanksgiving. And so we met in, uh, lake Martin with all my mom's extended family and, um.
Track 1:yeah.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:You actually came up too. Uh, and that Friday before the Iron Bowl, um, I proposed to, to Kayla to be my wife. And so we got engaged That Friday, kick six happened on Saturday. It was dope. And he ran right by me and it was awesome. And, and cool story about Chris Davis. I'll be very short with this. Chris Davis is one of the most humble dudes I know, like I was, he was there the entire time I worked there. Uh, I didn't work with defense very much, but, um, obviously you're around the team so much, you know, all the guys. Um, he also is, uh, famously known for giving up the, the final touchdown against, uh, Florida State, the national Championship. He was guarded. Kevin, Kevin Benjamin, and, um, he, Kevin Benjamin was like six eight and Chris Davis is like five 11. He can't guard that. So James just threw it up. They scored, he gave up the. The winning touchdown after that game, obviously we were all like, so sad. We just lost down championship game. We had it right in our grips and, and lost. Um, he came into the training room, uh, in Pasadena and just Shook all of our hands and gave us all a hug each, each athletic trainer, and said, thank you for everything you've done for me and the rest of this team my whole career. And this year, uh, we wouldn't be where we are without you guys. And I was like, man, that, like, he took time outta that night after one of probably the worst nights of his life to come and thank you know us. Um, so Trayvon Reed also did that too. And now he's on staff with Auburn football. So anyways, they're just two guys that I just really think very highly of. Um, I like to tell that story as much as I can. So, cool story.
Track 1:No, that is a cool story. My cool story in college was that I went, was at your house during the kick six. So like that's as cool as that gets for me. I was at least
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Oh, the house in Auburn. Yeah.
Track 1:Yeah, that was it,
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Dude, what's so funny is that, you know, I had student tickets even though I didn't use them. I bought'em so that I could give them to like, you, I could give it to Blake or whatever. Uh, so Blake took my ticket. He sat in the student section with Pearlstein and after the kick six, like obviously the fans rushed the field and Pearlstein like, he's like, he like wants to go really bad down there, but he looks back at Blake and he's like, but do I leave him? Do I stay with him? And Blake was like, man, get your butt down there. Uh, and so for you guys don't know, my brother's Alabama grad. He's big time Alabama fan and sat there, so, and saw all that happen. So
Track 1:The, the University of Alabama.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:So let's, Jake, what do you feel about what happened this, this past weekend with with Auburn?
Track 1:I, um, I've told the story before, uh, a couple times, maybe several times I've told the story to a hundred people, but like my dad is 2017 or 2018, I think Auburn was playing LSU. Auburn the previous year was up like 19 and nothing to LSU end up getting beat at home. I, I think it was at home, or maybe they were at LSU then. It doesn't matter. But you know, they flip flop every year. So this 2018, Auburn was winning most of the game, I think, and then ended up LSU kicked the last second field goal. My parents were in town for that game. We put up a, uh. A swing set for my oldest daughter who was one at the time. And, um, the whole first half, we just spent putting the swing set up. So like I missed the first half and I was upset about it. My dad wanted to listen to the Troy football game on the radio, and I was like, I listened to the Daggone Troy football game on the radio when Auburn's playing LSU, and they're trying to have like a good year. You know, they're trying to have a bounce back year. Anyway, so we watched the second half and I'm naturally just like, you know, upset, tense, Phil goal kicks, Auburn loses. There's a box of, there's like a little bucket of Annie's small toys. They're all plastic toys and I just like kick it and I cuss. And then I sit down and my dad is very good about like giving me advice when I don't ask for it and when I'm not ready for it. But like this time he was, he was very. Intentional about like letting me cool down for a second. And I wasn't like super mad, but it, I mean like I was mad enough to kick my daughter's choice and cuss. So like I sit down, I'm just like, you know, shaking my head watching disbelief and then my dad was like, son, I've been watching Auburn football for 30 years. And he is like, and they always disappoint. He that the sooner you can. He said, the sooner you realize that, the happier you'll be in your life. He's like, years, they're terrible. They end up being good and years they're supposed to be really good. They're terrible. And he is like, it's just, that's just who they are. Um, so going into it, I thought Auburn was gonna get beat 50 to nothing. And then they like, you know, it was like seven quick. I was like, hmm. I was like, here we go.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Yeah. Yeah, I thought so
Track 1:just like stayed in it. And I was like, wait a second. And then they, they did what they always do though, man, they, they, they take my heart and they hold it in their hands and then they
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:I know, man,
Track 1:apart.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:and like me and Jake, we were texting the whole time. Me, you and Pearlstein, and.
Track 1:yeah.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Like we were all saying, like, is this real? Like, can, can this be? And, and Jake, and Jake and Pearlstein love to, um, say like, it's a running joke because it's always, it's the running joke is like, we're back, Auburn's back like
Track 1:we're back baby.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:it's, it's a joke. They're obviously joking, but I'm like, man, Will Auburn ever be back? Have they ever been, you know, anything? I don't, I don't. I mean, they obviously are a pretty good program. I saw a stat today, they're like top 15 of most wins of any division one football program. So that's, I mean, that's cool, but I. You know, we were texting the whole time. I was like, I was like, guys, y'all gotta stop saying that because it always comes back to bite us. It always, and I said, I'm not trying to be a pessimist or pessimistic or anything, but like, Auburn will let you down. They will, they will build you up and then just let you down. And not all the time, sometimes they come through. Um, but your dad is so wise in saying that because man, it just like creates like So much frustration and, and 18, 19, 20, 21 year olds, uh, on a Saturday,
Track 1:Mm-Hmm.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:especially at the iron ball, when we were that close, I mean literally fourth and 31, the chances of them converting that to a touchdown and winning the game, like I would have to say, I don't know the chances. I would say it's gotta be like, like 99 point something percent that Auburn's gonna win that game and they
Track 1:yeah. If you check the. SPN has these like, you know, percent chance of winning the game and they'll update it as the game goes along. Uh, but like the last fourth and 31 in Auburn had a 99.99% chance of winning. So it is literally like a, according to E-S-P-N-A 0.01% chance of winning.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Geez, man.
Track 1:they did,
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Hey, kudos to, kudos to them. Apparently, uh, Saban said they practiced that, um. Now they probably did it like during walkthroughs, I guess from my experience of being around the team, like they probably go through different situations during walkthroughs. I don't know how much they actually practice it. I'm not there. But I do know my time being with the team at Auburn, like we went through scenarios like that.'cause I was with the offense. So we went through scenarios like that. That was just like, well I'm even practicing this. This is not even gonna happen. But apparently Saban said they did practice that and that was planned. Um, I. Not gonna try to go too much detail about this, but man, what'd you think about the defensive decision, like on Auburn's side on that fourth and 31?
Track 1:I mean, I've heard from a lot of people over the years that like, prevent defense will get you beat, like regardless. Well, you know, like, it just hasn't, doesn't have a long a good track record of like stopping defenses or stopping offenses, but. I think would they rush two and have a spy or they rush three and have a spy.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Yeah, they rushed too and had a spy.
Track 1:it's like nothing. It's just like take, don't even have linemen, just like make, put 11 DBS on the field then and just have'em all drop back. You know what I mean?
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:then Like but then it's just like backyard football, you know, like if you're playing backyard football and you don't rush the quarterback he has all day. Eventually these receivers are gonna run all over the place. Now, like I said, I don't think I'm, I'm sure according to Saban they practice this. So they had it to where they would get one-on-one the corner, uh, where they bring the safeties over, but. I mean, why even have a spy? Like what, what good was that? If RO takes off and run, okay, you have, you have, you have nine guys in the end zone, he can come and make a tackle like, so you might as well just go out and play with 10 there. Um, not, might as well just play with 10.'cause he was non-existent. And then the rush two man, I was just like, yeah. You know. And on seven on seven football, like during high school, seven on seven tournaments, you know how long the quarterback has to throw the ball?
Track 1:Like five seconds
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Five seconds. If he doesn't throw it in five seconds. it's a sack. Yeah. Soro had like, like, it was like six, it was like seven to eight seconds I think. I looked back and went back and looked. It felt like forever'cause he just sat back there and waited. So anyways, it happens.
Track 1:don't, yeah, just don't. I don't, I mean, I don't know what I, I know nothing, you know, like I'm just a kid from Pike County who chose a football program to love, you know what I mean? Like, I'm silent for this every year and I don't even have to, like, I could have. I'm gonna tell anybody if you are, if you, for whatever reason, if you don't live in Alabama and you're listening to this and you're like, I need a college football program, and you are thinking about picking Auburn, I need you to know ahead of time that if you pick Auburn, you're picking heartbreak. A lot of times you need to have other hobbies. Do not let Auburn football be your number one hobby because you'll live a just a joyless life. With Auburn being your number one, and but to your credit, like, or I guess to your point earlier about Auburn, and we will get off Auburn, but like, I think we're conflicted because we've been to the top, we've been to another national championship in our lifetime and like we're in 2004, we're undefeated. Like we've had several like really good years
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Yep.
Track 1:and, and Auburn does, has historically won a lot of football games, so it's like. Like you at the same time, you can't really blame'em. But like Georgia and Alabama are at the height of their, their program histories kind of like at the same time. So you're like, you're kind of stuck. You're, you're literally stuck. You're literally stuck in between Athens and Tuscaloosa and you're trying to recruit both places
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Yep.
Track 1:and trying to convince a coach to come there and win. It's just
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:And you know what's crazy, Jake is like when we were in college, like while I was at Auburn, like we went to national championship twice, two outta the four years I was at Auburn, we went national championship twice. So like. That's pretty good. Um, but since then it's been just like a, a trickle downhill. But anyways, but you know, I, I'm never gonna say, uh, congrats to Alabama because I'm a sorry loser when it comes to Alabama and Auburn playing against each other. I'll just be real. But, um, yeah, we'll, we'll see what happens. Um, we'll see what happens on Saturday when they play Georgia.
Track 1:Yeah. Well, um, I think this kind of goes hand in hand with what we're gonna talk about tonight is like, uh, you know, we, we, well, last time we talked about, you know, biblical, like biblical, uh, or. Biblical manhood and just, you know, where I guess that episode's called, where are, are the biblical men? But really we just wanna talk about the characteristics of biblical men and like what scripture says. Um, and I think it's best that we like continue that because, I mean, and you know, just to give everyone a heads up, we're not ever gonna spend like eight episodes in a row. On like one topic, um, like I think we could spend eight episodes on Biblical men and just godliness in, in man, in men in general. But I just don't, I don't know that I have the bandwidth or the patience for that either. But, um, and. I think we wanted to go in the direction of self-control tonight because it's very relevant talking about Auburn football. Like, and you know, me kicking a bunch of toys when Al when Auburn gets beat by LSU in the last second, like, I didn't have, I didn't displace self-control with. My tongue or self-control with my emotions. Um, and I think self-control is like a huge, uh, it is a, well, first it's a fruit of the spirit, which we'll get into, but it's a just a huge characteristic of, of what a godly man is. Um, and I guess just a, just sort of kick it off, like me and Blake Miller did a. Uh, if you wanna go back and listen to it, I think it's called Spiritual Gifts. I think that was the title of the episode and it's probably, I don't know, episode, I'm just gonna say 40, somewhere in that area. Um, but we talked a lot about that. Um, so you should go check it out. Um, When I think of self-control, it's easy for me to think of like food intake first of all. Um, because when you hear people secularly talk about self-control, most of'em are referring to their diet. Like, oh, I just don't have good self-control when I'm around sweetss. And like, to some extent like, sure, like that's. Gluttony is sinful, you know, but like, I don't think any of us really consider that when we're thinking of self-control. When I think of self-control, I think of, um, I think of my thoughts, I think of my lustful thoughts. I think of like, um, just my, my tongue. In the book of James, it talks a lot about chapter three talks is just all about taming the tongue. Um. I think there's just a, a significant need in, um, exercising self-control over your, over your, your sinful flesh. Um, so what you think.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Yeah. I mean, you know, the, uh, the world, the world will, you know, as, as a sinful world that we live in and that we're part of, um, you know, they. Often the world will, and the culture will tell you what self-control is and you know, they'll tell you, you know, it could be a self-control man is, you know, somebody that, um, or just a biblical man in general is somebody that has like. You know, that is, that is strong and a strong leader. Um, and none of these things are, are terrible, but has, you know, makes money that provides for their family. Um, you know, and it goes on and sometimes it's even like, you know, you're an athlete. Like that can be a definition of a man, um, from a culture and all those things that the, the culture will tell you. The world will tell you what biblical manhood is like. It all involves being self controlled. So like in an athlete's standpoint, like you have to be self controlled. Um. In order to achieve your athletic goals, whether that's, you know, if I want to, uh, some things there's just God-given. But if I want to gain, you know, 15 pounds or put on 25 pounds, I gotta work hard to get to that point. And it's gonna require a lot of self-control in my eating, my diet. You know, it's gonna require a lot of self-control to me saying no to other things so that I can go, you know, say yes to things that will make me reach that goal. Um, but like, you know, you said that the Self-control is obviously one of the fruits of the spirit. Um, so obviously it's a gift to us. Like it's, it's something that, that, we necessarily, that self-control doesn't necessarily rest on our power and our willpower, our mind power, our physical strength.'cause if, if it's a free of the spirit, then it's given to us. Um, so it has nothing to do with us. Um, and also. I think about it, um, if it's a, if it's a fruit of the spirit, then that means that obviously there's something in us that needs to be contained, I guess, or, um, or chiseled away, um, so that the spirit's fruits can take over. Uh, so like, I never thought about that. I, I started reading through stuff, um, know, preparing for this and I read a. Desiring God article that talked about this, and I was just like, man, like, you know, I've never thought about it. Like I knew it was a fruit of the spirit, but I never thought about it as like, you know, it really doesn't depend on me. Uh, it's just more so me responding to the spirit and allowing the spirit to change me to be more self-controlled, if that makes sense. Um. So, yeah, I think, uh, reading the, I guess escalations five, it talks about the fruits of the spirit. 5 22 and
Track 1:Yeah, yeah. Says, but the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control against such things. There is no such law.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Yep.
Track 1:if you need a good way to memorize that, then there's a song that my daughter sings. That'll definitely get stuck in your head,
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Oh yeah.
Track 1:uh, I think, uh, yeah, I thought that was, I, I, I think you nailed it. I was also like, I was thinking about the book of James a lot, just'cause I think if you had to ask me like, what are, if I had to take my top three New Testament books, now that I'm ranking them, like if you had to take one gospel, I think it'd be John. If you had to take one other book that Paul wrote, I think it would be like Romans, and then if I had to take another just book, uh, it would be James. Like, so I think I, I love reading James. I'll read, I'll read James several times a year. Um,
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:I agree.
Track 1:James one 19 is one of my favorite verses from, um, From James because it's like, I mean it like, I guess when I was reading, when, when I read it, I don't think of it as like self-control. I just think of like, these are things I struggle with and I just need God to change me. But it says, let know this, my beloved brothers let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God. And like quick, quick to hear is like. Maybe self-control. They are like, like disciplining, uh, having discipline to just listen instead of just like, have your mind wander. But when I really think of like slow to speak and slow to anger, those are definitely exercising self-control because like I'm the, I'm the best at getting angry, uh, very quickly for no reason at all. And then lashing out and like, you know. Just reiterating on chapter three in James is just talking about taming the tongue and how like your tongue is like such a small, uh, fire that can like, set a force ablaze. And it describes it as being like a rudder on a ship and like how, how such a small part of the ship can like, steer the whole ship into it like a, a totally new direction. Um, and like exercise, like just not having self-control over. Even the smallest member of your body can be the most devastating, like friendships can be ruined. You can say the wrong thing to your spouse, which I've never done, but I've heard other people who have done that. That's a joke. I've said plenty of wrong things today to.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:a hundred percent. Me too.
Track 1:I was waiting for you to laugh, and I was like, did he miss the joke? Did I say it with such confidence that, you were like, I'm gonna see where he was gonna go with that.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Well, I, just was, I was little, little thrown off by that. Uh, me too, dude.
Track 1:you're like, I don't know if he meant that. Yeah. Uh, but yeah,
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:yeah, I, I'm, I'm with you on that, man. I, I, I struggle with controlling my tongue and being self-controlled with my tongue, especially to Kayla and to my two children. I think, you know, espec, I've, I've, I. We've, I've definitely worked on it and prayed a lot. I say work on it like, you know, I've, I've tried to be more conscientious of it because I feel like the spirit has really opened up my eyes to say, Hey, man, like what you're saying. Like, you might not be meaning it this way, but. The way you're saying it is really tearing down your wife and it's tearing down your children. And then like I start thinking about like, man, like because I'm not being self controlled, those times when I'm frustrated and I'm angry because I'm not being self controlled. Like what is so this is sin. This is sin that I'm causing on my children and my wife. So how is that gonna affect like later down the road when my children get older? Like, you know, or how's that gonna affect my relationship with my wife? Because sin has effects and it's always negative. So then I'm like, oh man. But the good thing is like, I feel like that right there alone, like acknowledging, saying like, yeah, I. I don't have self-control in my tongue. I cannot tame it. I need help. Um, and so if you're not a Christian, like what do you go, what do you go to? Like what? Like what do you find? Like I don't, I don't really know like what people that don't believe in Jesus and don't have a relationship with him and don't have a spirit, like, I don't know what they put, what they go to. I mean, they could go to drinking, you know, they could go to drugs. Some people that want to be super, you know, Um, mentally tough and, uh, having self-control maybe, you know, um, out y Yeah. I mean, you know, so like, I just, I just don't know. So like, it's a good thing, like when I. When you see that and you acknowledge it and you confess it and repent, like that's that. That's that chisel in away of your own sinfulness and allow the spirit to produce that self-control in you.'cause like I said, man, I. I never really thought about it until a couple days ago. I was like, holy cow. It is a fruit of the spirit, so therefore it's gifted to us. So it's not something I can just like, you know, pop up and just say, oh yeah, I'm a man of self-control. Yeah. It's something that's given to us as a gift to help us be more like Christ and to be more like Christ be shaped like him. So I'm with you on that. I struggle with that all the time.
Track 1:I have, I have a question and it's okay if you disagree. Um, but I'm just curious. I, I, I was thinking about like, what are some ways that I have falsely. Exhibited self-control like you were talking about. Um, you don't exhibit good self-control when you're talking to Kayla and your kids and you're like, wait, like at first thoughts, you're like, oh, these are the people I should experience, I should have the most self-control with. Or like, you know, be shown the most grace to. But I personally think that I'm. Conditioned to hold everything in. Like if I go to work and someone wrongs me, or I'm in public and someone wrongs me, I've been conditioned to just let, like let it go. Treat them with respect, show exercise, self-control. Don't get angry with them, don't lash out at them, you know, forgive them, whatever. And then when you get home, then you're like, now I can just let loose and I don't have to do that anymore. So then it becomes like behavior modification where you're like, I'm just. I'm presenting to you self-control on the outside, but really on the inside, like I'm still like, I'm still just as mad at you or I, I would love to cuss you out, or whatever it is. Uh, but like, I'm not going to do that because I'm a man of self-control. But when I get home, like now that no one's watching, I can do whatever I want.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Yeah, that,
Track 1:behavior modification is like an example of how that can like be falsely misrepresented as self-control?
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Absolutely I do and I am guilty of it, uh, because man, like. I'm, I'm around 14 and 15 year olds all day. And I'm not gonna lie, it, it is draining it. Sometimes I just get so annoyed because they just don't do what I, you know, what's best for them. Um, and sometimes, like you said, I just reach my breaking point and then like I come home and. With a five-year-old and almost 2-year-old. And then Kayla doesn't do something that I feel like she should do it in a certain way. And so then I just snap and I blow it all on her. And it's like, and, and then like I struggle with like, like. Um, I struggle with like, calming down quickly and letting it go. Like I have to, like, and then I, and I don't control my mouth. I just start talking. I wanna talk about it right then and there, and does it matter the consequences? And, and Kayla's the opposite. Like she wants to, you know, process it and think about it, and then come back and talk to it in a calm way, which is, you know, there's a balance. But anyways, that's the whole Part of the story, but yes, I'm guilty of that. And so like when you're saying that like I think about it like true self-control is to me like, because we talked about it, it's a free of the spirit. True self-control is not about me like controlling myself. Uh, it's about living under the power of the Holy Spirit and the power of Christ. And so if I try to me myself. Be a man of self-control. I will fail every single time. I will fail all. If I tried on my own power to try to read all these powerful self-controlled, uh, quotes or even just read bible verses. I mean, just read bible verses and say, okay, I'm gonna do this today. Like literally in like 10 minutes, I'm gonna go fail, uh, because I'm still putting my trust in What I know in my, in my mind and not allowing the spirit to work through me and listening to the spirit and being aware of what he wants to do. So, absolutely, dude, I think that's like a a hundred percent, um, being, I guess just fake about it. I mean, that's really what it is.
Track 1:Yeah, it can be in like, I mean we were talking about anger a lot, I guess, and taming in the tongue, but I guess self-control could be, you know, really whatever you, whatever it is in relation to, like, I. Pleasing yourself. I, I said it came out wrong. but like But, seriously, like Alright. I'm, I said pleasing yourself. Okay, let's just get over it. People. But, but like you, but,
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:We're not editing that one out.
Track 1:we're not. Leave it in there. Show them that it's authentic.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:But it's the truth though, like that's part of being like self-control.
Track 1:Right, because like, and it's, it's like, it's all about like, am I worshiping myself or am I worshiping God? Like, and if I'm not worshiping God, I'm worshiping myself. So like, I wanna do what feels good to Jake. I want to. Be comfortable. I want food to taste good and I want to taste it all the time. You know, or I want to be lazy, or I want to, you know, look at this girl'cause that makes me, you know, excited or whatever it is. And like, that's just, yeah, it's, it's just a, it's a sin issue and it's a selfishness heart issue. Um, but I think I was, you know. It's always a bonus if you can bring Jesus back into it. Right. But like, um, I was thinking too about like how self-control is exhibited, and I'm like, well, where did Jesus exhibit self-control? And like, you can look at literally any chapter, probably in any book and show where Jesus has exhibited self-control. Um, because he has constantly been, I, I guess try to put yourself in the. Attempt to put yourself in the shoes of God's son, right? Like you're God's son, like you're Jesus Christ. you could do whatever you want. You can. You can kill this guy if you want for sinning. You can fly from one place to the other. You can teleport. You know what everyone's thinking. You know everything. There's nothing literally you can't and can't do, and you, because you love Me and Parker and the rest of the world have decided to give up. Well lay down that, guess, like, you know, that lay down your life to come here and humble yourself and be a human, and then just like serve others and take it in the face and get beat to death and hung on a cross. You know what I mean? Like. So if that's not like every, every, from, from the first moment you're really introduced to Jesus to the last, it's like every moment was like a, an exhibit or exhibit. Every moment Jesus exhibited, like self-control. Um, whether it be like lashing out in anger or pride and saying like, well, I'm just gonna do what I want. You know, like withholding that and. On like, you know, the love he has for us is greater than everything. So that's what I.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Yeah. Like, no, I, I think you're on track because. Like, there's so many instances that you could talk about. Just like you said, there's so many instances where Jesus showed self-control and what it actually looks like for a biblical man to have self-control, um, from his tongue, from which I know he was God, but he was still fully human. And, and, um, first Corinthians, it talks about that he has faced everything that we have faced and yet without sin. And so. If that's true, then he has faced with situations where he could have been like really angry and said something that was really hurtful to somebody else. Um, or he could have, you know, had he was tempted with the, uh, temptation to lust over another woman. Um. There's every temptation he is faced with every single temptation we have except without sin. Um, that right there alone is self-control. And not only that, but like he came to purchase our salvation for us. And not only that, he came to send us. He came to purchase that to die for us to rise again and then to give us the gift of the Holy Spirit. And he said all throughout his life, it is better that I leave than me stay with you because I'm gonna live inside of you and I'm gonna make you more like me. Um, and I'm gonna give you one of the fruit of spirits to be self-control. Um. I know in like, this is not Jesus, but, um, let's see if these, yes. Paul, Paul writes some First Thessalonians, I'm not gonna read. All of it. But first, last Thessalonians four, he talks about a life that's pleasing to God and just a few verses. He says, finally then, brother, this is verse one. We ask and urge you and the Lord Jesus, that as you receive from us how you ought to walk and to please God. Just as you are doing that, you do so more and more. Um, and then he goes on to verse three says, for this is the will of God, your sanctification, that you abstain from sexuality, that each one of you know how to control his own body and holiness and honor not the passions of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God, that no one transgress and wrong his brother in this matter because the Lord is an avenger in all these things. As we told you beforehand, and Somn warned you, and this is, this is like the big verse that I kind of wanna talk about. And I think this applies a hundred percent to Jesus. For God has, this is verse seven. For God has not called us for impurity, but in holiness. Therefore, because he is called us to, uh, not impurity, but it's called us to holiness. Therefore, whoever disregards this disregards not man, but God and God is the one who gives his Holy Spirit to you. So you want to have self-control like I. This is exactly what Jesus did. Like he set aside all of his wants, all of his desires. He set aside his glory. He set aside his, uh, everything to come and be with his creation to save us. That was his mission, and he stayed firm until the end. And the reason why he did it was to purchase our salvation forest and to give us that Holy Spirit. And he did not disregard this, uh, because he did not disregard man, and he gave us us that Holy Spirit. Um. Man, you wanna know self-control. Just read the gospels. I mean, holy cow, he showed self-control. How many times did Jesus go and like off by himself and just pray? Like just, just spend time praying. You know, like that shows self-control right there just alone.
Track 1:Yeah. Yeah. It's, uh, I, I, I think it's funny, uh, speaking of that, like you, you. Read a lot, and maybe I've mentioned this or may I heard this from someone else. I didn't come across this by my own finding. So someone was like, if you notice like Jesus, like you always notice like the miracle to miracle, you know, to whatever, wherever he's talking to preaching. But like the in between moments are where. It'll set. Like the first verse will be like, and Jesus arose early in the morning then like, and then went to pray, and then like you're like, all right, cool. What about verse two? Like show me the good part. Like he probably spent just as much time, I'm totally, I don't know if this factually, but like in a day he could have spent maybe Maybe not as much time but spent a lot of time like maybe an hour, two hours, just in prayer with God and then went on to start his day. So like, it's like one verse that you can skip over Will like just to get to what you think is the good power part and you miss out on like something that's mostly like probably more important in a lot of ways.'cause we like to think about. I am getting off on a tangent. I'm sorry, but I, I, whenever I read scripture, like I'm often, uh, trying to think of how can I apply this? You know, like what's the
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Hmm.
Track 1:Um, and I'm not, I guess, at the forefront, I'm not thinking about like, what? Like why don't I just talk to God about this? You know? Like, why don't I just ask God to change my heart? Why don't I ask God to like. What, what do you, what about this? Do you want to stick with me and just like, remind me of it, you know? Um, I'm always worried about like, what can Jake do? How can Jake fix this? Or how can, how can Jake apply this in his life? Um, anyway, that was my sidebar tangent. So
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Well, I, so, and, and I, I to include what you're saying right there, one of my favorite verses is Hebrews five, eight, and, um, it says, although he was a son talk this time about Jesus, although he was the son of God, he learned obedience through what he suffered. So like though he was the son of God, he still learned obedience, he still learned self-control. Um, so you know, if he. Learned obedience through what he suffered, through what he went through. Are we not called to the same thing? And it doesn't mean like, you know, maybe he does call us to suffer and to be martyrs. Maybe he, um, like, you know, when I think of word suffer that it could be a lot of different things. Uh, you know, for us Beckham being in the hospital for Uh, 90 days. Like that's a, that's a big deal, um, for us. And it was hard, but we learned so much through that. And really we learned a lot about self-control and how we can control our minds and our thoughts and how we can allow the spirit to speak truth to us instead of us believing lies that, you know. I can go into so much story about that, but like through what we went through, we learned obedience. Now we didn't do it like Christ because we were, we were not perfect by all means, in that we failed a lot. But I feel like, you know, when it comes to, uh, self-control. It really needs, like you have to go through things sometimes in order to learn how to be more self-control and allow the spirit to speak true to you in those moments and not believe the lies of your emotions and feelings and all that kind of stuff. Um,
Track 1:Right. Yeah. Yeah.'cause then it goes back to like, are you trusting in yourself to fix it? Like what? Who needs self-control? If I can fix it myself, like I'll just do it. Like why would I, why would I withhold something I can fix? You know? Like instead of just like trusting, like, no God, God's got that.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:And dude in that moment, like that's one of the biggest things that we learned, uh, when Becca was in the hospital. Like we could do absolutely nothing except sit there and watch him just fight for his life and we just couldn't do anything. And so it really forced us. Like, we thank God for that situation now, even though it was not fun. We thank God for that because it forced us to like, speak truth to ourselves by reading scripture to each other, by praying scripture. Uh, because then it, it didn't depend on us. It depended solely on the Lord. Um. I really don't feel like we would be where we are today spiritually without going through something like that. And even if he would've, you know, not, uh, survived, I still feel like it, it would've taught us a lot more than if we didn't go through that, um, anyways. But, uh, you know, that's one why, it's one of my favorite verses that Jesus, if he learned obedience through what he suffered. Then we need to learn obedience and self-control and things like that through the things we go through in our life. And so my question I guess for you is like, if you have somebody that's, you know, that doesn't really know Jesus or that is, you know, kind of figuring all this stuff out, how would you explain to them like, what is self-control in a biblical man and what does it look like in a biblical man?
Track 1:Hmm. So. Is this person an Auburn fan? I'm just kidding. I'm just playing. It goes back to the Auburn. No. Uh, so if I'm explaining this to someone who's either like a new Christian or someone who's just asking the question, who isn't a Christian? I would say like, I would probably try to use concrete examples to start off with of like, you know, like it's easy for me to see something as an American and like go get it if it's. Food. If it's like, know, like drugs, alcohol, tobacco, uh, sexual impurity, like whatever I want, I can go get it because America has offered me freedom, but it doesn't mean it's beneficial for my soul. God didn't create me to take everything and just like. Indulge myself in the passions of my flesh. Um, you know, walking with Christ is all is. It's like, I don't wanna say like all and speaking absolutes, but like walking with Christ a lot of times results with you denying yourself like it's toxin. I don't even forget Matthew. Denying yourself and pick up your cross daily. Like you gotta die to yourself every day. A guy named Jamie Hampton was a, uh, football player, Troy, great guy. Um, uh, he was a. Awesome. He's an awesome Christian. Um, not that there aren't awesome Christians, but he, he told me a beach project He, he told me, he told me a beach project one time. He is like, Jake, I just woke up every day and I told God, I was like, God, I need you to kill Jamie Hampton today so that Christ can live through me today. And he was just dying to his flesh so that he can live to love God and love people. Um, and so that's what I. I would explain self-control. Um,
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:So how would you? like, what would you say to like that same type of person, like, okay, well I'm, I'm with you. I'm, I'm tracking with you on this, but how do I obtain that? Like, how do I, how do I become like this godly man? What would you say to that?
Track 1:Yeah, so. Obtain, you know, like you're not gonna earn it. And then we go into like, um. That I'm a sinner. You're a sinner. Everyone. Because of sin, we've separated ourselves from God and that the only way we can spend an eternity with God is through the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus, which has already been done. It's already been paid for. You don't have to do anything. And so if you believe that and you repent of your sins and you follow Christ and like God's, when you, the moment you die, you're gonna step foot in eternity with God. Like, you can rest in that and there's nothing more to do, and that should be freeing and lifting. Now, that day you're gonna wake up and you're, you're gonna, like, if you accept Christ, you're gonna go to sleep and it's gonna be awesome. You're gonna wake up and you're gonna be like, well, now what I do do I like have the self-control now. And it's like, no. That's when like sanctification. That's when the sanctification process starts. And like you spend from that moment to the rest of your life and you just pray that like, God, I wanna read your word because you tell me this is what's good for me. So like, will you change my heart in this area? And,
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Yeah.
Track 1:and like over time, like it's, it's like anything else. Like you're not gonna be good at anything, just. The first day. I mean, some people may, I'm not, I'm not really good at anything the first day, uh, or the second or the 10th year. Um, but like you look back and you're like, oh man, like I, this is all the area, um, that I've grown, uh, in any facet, whether it be self-control or whatever.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Yep. I agree with that, man. I, I think you hit it
Track 1:Would you say anything different?
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Not really.
Track 1:Would you add to that?
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:yeah, I, I think just real short, um, you know, I. I give a lot of credit to a lot of men in my life. Uh, when I became a Christian, that really took me alongside and be like, look, man, you're going to fail like you're a sinner. And just because you became a Christian now, like you're going to mess up. Um, and it's, it's how you handle that is how you handle that after you fail is so valuable and so important. Um, because dude, I know you'll agree with this. We both fail so much in self-control. And so like us even talking about, it's kinda laughable because I know I, I fail at it all the time. Um. As we've already mentioned before, but I think just, you know, I think our true source of self-control is found in Christ and when we lean on him and we seek him by being self-control by waking up early or spending time at night or whatever time for you. For me, it's waking up early before my children get up, before my wife get up and I spend time with the word. Do I fail at that a lot? Yes. Like this morning, I, I was supposed to get up at five and I didn't get outta bed till five 30, so that cut off 30 min, 30 minutes of my time with the word. Um, but when we are self-controlled and being obedient to Christ and trying to learn more and be more like him and spend time with him and prayer, you know, saying I crucify myself, be more like him, I think it just becomes more and more that sanctification process become more like Christ until the day that we die be fully like him in heaven. Um, and it's not. But man, it is so worth it. So worth it.
Track 1:Yeah. And I think the last thing I'll say is that, you know, I've, I've talked to some younger men recently and they're just like not, I mean, they're not like defeated or anything, but they're just like, you know, like, especially when you first become a Christian, like I can remember. I remember something happened and I was just like real beat up about it and I was like, I thought, I was like, you know, I, in my mind I was like, I thought I was past this, you know? And like you said, like you failed. But like, if you go back to Psalm 1 0 3, um, I'm gonna start in verse nine and just. 14 and so says he will not always child, nor will he keep his anger forever talking about God. He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities for as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great as his steadfast love towards those who fear him. As far as the east is from the West, so far does he remove our transgressions from us as a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear him. He knows our frame. He remembers that we are dust. Um, and so like, that's always like comforting.'cause you read the Old Testament God and you think, man, that God, that God, that Old Testament God like is He's gonna kill me. He's gonna swallow me up in a hole and I'm gonna go straight to Sheel. That's a numbers reference But like, like, and still just, just reading about how God is. Just patient with us and forgiving and merciful. And it just gives me comfort to know, like it, I guess it just brings me back to the gospel and reminding me like, I don't have to be perfect. I don't have to do anything. God's not gonna love me more if I were to have sinned less today versus tomorrow, or whatever. Um, so I'd say that that's some encouragement.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Yep.
Track 1:Do you have anything to close with?
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:No, I just think I. We men should pray for each other, excuse me, and be willing to be vulnerable with each other so that we can be more like Christ.
Track 1:Same. I appreciate it. I appreciate you being, uh, an accountability friend,
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Yes, you too, Smitty.
Track 1:Well, that's all we got. So if you're an Auburn fan, just reach out to us, we'll help you get there. If you're an Alabama fan, um, find somebody else to talk to about it. I don't, I don't wanna talk to you about it.
squadcaster-6b54_2_11-28-2023_201336:Me either
Track 1:Yeah. we'll see you next time.
